Prelude to 2017 Meanderings

Why Journey On?

Letters to My Sis

Originally, I named this blog “Journey On” because it was supposed to capture my husband Chris’ and my retirement forays, our adventures.  It was also in reference to the “moving on” we were doing after his scary diagnosis—the reason we retired together whether or not it made sense—and the commitment to not waste a minute more of life on anything but the bucket list and living life to its fullest.  It became a “Journey On” from fear, from obstacles, and from feeling limited by anything.

And so we proceeded with that agenda…then some harsh realities occurred and I found myself questioning the “plan”.  Chris and I have continued to deal with the scary times accompanying things he is dealt—test results that indicate some tough times ahead, unexplained internal bleeding events that have us knocking on various ER doors at times, etc.  As he pushes on to live every moment that he can, I want and need to be there with him.  Sometimes, I wind up making some hard choices as important events come up and I weigh things out on the “potential regret” scale—assessing what decisions I can most live with, no matter how hard they might be.

 

This spring, my sister Kris went through one of the most horrendous journeys of her own—an unimaginable shift in her life and in those lives of loved ones around her—when she ended up with emergency brain surgery and the trauma of recovery, including a month-long coma and then weeks of physical therapy.  At first we all were horrified by the possibility that we would not have her in our lives and it was touch and go there that first month especially.  With the amazing support of family and friends she has there in the Philadelphia area, and the awesome strength she has within her, she has rallied back to build her physical health, and continues to work around the struggles that are her new set of mental challenges. What will her journey look like in 6 months?  In a year?  No one knows for sure.

None of us knows what our next challenge or next page will be.  That is the simultaneous beautiful mystery and pisser of life.

So I’ve been thinking a lot about this “Journey On” business, and at first I have to admit to a desire to chuck it all out the window—like what right did I have to even contemplate joy or wonder, really?  I had no energy to take video, blog, post, or meander.  All of this harsh reality…what was the point?

Then the realization hit me:  that is the point…that is exactly the point.  The harsh realities should only make us want to cherish any magical moment that comes along.  Each odd and/or loving interaction with characters, each astounding natural phenomenon, every laughable moment, and every triumph…all of this needs our utmost attention.

My upcoming 2017 blogs will be in letter form to my sister…because she is with me everywhere I go and I want anything I experience to be something shared with her.  I’m hoping these letters will reach out and hug her, make her smile, laugh, and inspire her own “Journey On” musings.  And…since she has always been a much better writer than me, I’m also hoping to inspire her back to her craft to show me how it’s done.  I love you, Sis!